Night-light

the end

2008-09-29T16:50:00.000-07:00

SHUT DOWN!

shut down due to a lack of comments and readers, not sure how many who actually read this thing. I just don't want to write this for me and maybe 5 others. But I will be back in some way, some time!

Summer-movies!

2008-08-30T16:58:00.000-07:00

Well, summer is over and it's time to get back to work/school and all the other crap people normally do on weekdays. I have in the time between my last blog posts and now decided on at least one thing. One blog post every week is probably too much at the moment, so from now on I'm going to post only once per month. At least for now. So on to this month’s topic. Summer movies! Even though I realize it might be a little late for this kind of theme now, you can have something to remember next summer.

So you want to watch a summer movie? Well I got 4 words for you; Monster films, B-movies, and Disaster films...

As always this is MY point of view, if you don't like it or like it make sure to leave a comment.
Here is my top 10 list of movies for late summer nights:

1. Jaws (1975, Steven Spielberg)
A classic "monster film" were a gigantic great white shark begins to menace a small island community. A police chief, a marine scientist and a fisherman set out to stop it.
This movie is a great way to begin the summer!

2. Independence Day (1996, Roland Emmerich)
An alien movie that revolves around the beginning of July. The aliens are coming to earth and their goal is to invade and destroy. And July 4th becomes the day humanity will fight for its freedom.
This is the movie you need to see if you feel the need for some action and fight for independence.

3. Tremors (1990, Run Underwood)
The B-movie/monster film that involve a small isolated town and strange underground creatures which are killing everything in their path.
After this movie you will never look at worms the same way again.

4. Planet of the Apes (1968, Franklin J. Schaffner) / (2001, Tim Burton)
Another classic movie that contains: Sci-fi, action, romance and a great deal of fantasy. This movie is about an astronaut that crash lands on a planet inhabited by human-like apes, who rule the planet and the humans are oppressed and enslaved.
There are two versions of this movie, both is worth watching during the summer.

5. Jurassic Park (1993, Steven Spielberg)
Yet another incredible Spielberg-classic that draws you into a fantasy world were science has made it possible to clone dinosaurs to populate a theme park.
Nothing else to say about this movie than; Dinosaurs! Dinosaurs! Dinosaurs!

6. Evolution (2001, Ivan Reitman)
This is a really bad movie about human scientists and the discovery of an alien organism. A waste of time, but sometimes the summer can be too long and this is the way to kill some time.

7. Deep Blue Sea (1999, Renny Harlin)
This movie contains terrible special effects, Samuel L. Jackson, an awful looking shark, a horrible plot and even worse acting. In the search for a cure for Alzheimer’s a group of scientist get terrorized by a supposaly intelligent shark. Kick of your sandals and watch how to screw up an expensive movie project.

8. Twister (1996, Jan de Bont)
The 1996 classic summer/fall movie about some ”tornado-hunters” searching for the perfect storm. The best movie to watch when the wind blows and the rain is dripping outside.

9. Deep Impact (1998, Mimi Leder)
Another disaster film about a comet on its way to earth to create terror and masdistruction. This is the movie that made Armageddon look good. Don’t watch this if you have a fear of water or tsunamis.

10. Club Dread (2004, Jay Chandrasekhar)
The 10th and last movie you should watch this summer/fall is the B-movie that tried to be a comedy, but failed so hard it made Scary movie fun. This movie is about a gang that travels to Coconut Pete's Coconut Beach Resort only to find out there is a serial killer on the loose.

Hope you all had a fun summer. My new blog will be out in September so be there or be square...

Postludim

2008-03-27T04:42:00.000-07:00

As the most observing of you may have noticed, this blog post is named "Postludim". The reason for this is that after not having time to write new posts the last 2-3 Sundays I found out I need to take a break. This does not mean I wont be back to comment on things that annoy me, and write things that annoy others. I will be back when I got more time, probably in August or something. In the meanwhile have fun and enjoy this wierd world.

So long, and The End for now.

Superstitions for life (part 2)

2008-03-02T06:08:00.000-08:00

The 3 wierdest religions in the world:

1. Cleromancy
Cleromancy is a form of divination using sortilege, casting lots or casting bones in which an outcome is determined by random means, such as the rolling of dice. It’s as simple as it is stupid. To do this simple you just need a pen/pencil, a piece of paper large enough to write several options on, and a dice of your choice. If you have a six-sided dice, (which is the most common regular dice), you take your pen/pencil and write the numbers 1-6 on your paper. Write down the different choices/options/outcomes to your decision/situation/problem next to the numbers. Then you simply roll the dice and the number shown on your dice represent the number of the option on your paper which you then have to do. For example: If I don’t know what to eat for dinner, I can write down: 1. Nachos, 2. Bread, 3. Chocolate, 4. Nothing, 5. Soup, 6. Coffee beans. If my dice then lands with number 6 up, my dinner for the day is going to be horrible.
And if want to choose this religion there are several books and other information regarding this, and if you choose t do it simple you pretty much are your own God. Or you might consider seeing a therapist to learn how to take control of your own life more effectively.

2. Magic 8-Ball
The Magic 8-Ball is used for fortune-telling. It is a hollow, plastic sphere resembling an oversized, black and white 8-ball. Inside is one or more dices floating in a dark blue liquid. Each of the faces of the die (/dices) has an affirmative, negative, or non-committal statement printed on it. There is a transparent window on the bottom of the 8-ball through which these messages can be read. To use the ball, it must be held with the window initially facing down. After "asking the ball" a yes-or-no question, the user then turns the ball so that the window faces up. When the die floats to the top pressed against the window, the raised letters reveal the message. The 20 standard answers on a Magic 8-Ball are: 1. As I see it, yes, 2. Ask again later, 3. Better not tell you now, 4. Cannot predict now, 5. Concentrate and ask again, 6. Don't count on it, 7. It is certain, 8. It is decidedly so, 9. Most likely, 10. My reply is no, 11. My sources say no, 12. Outlook good, 13. Outlook not so good, 14. Reply hazy, try again, 15. Signs point to yes, 16. Very doubtful, 17. Without a doubt, 18. Yes, 19. Yes – definitely, 20. You may rely on it.
As you may have noticed it is 10 more or less positive replies, 5 similar to maybe, and 5 similar to no. Conclusion is that this is not a random religion; this is for the people stupid enough to believe a toy that 50% of the times want a positive answer.

3. Cartomancy
Cartomancy is a form of fortune-telling or divination using a deck of cards. The practice of Cartomancy has been observed since playing cards first came into use in Europe in the 14th century. Practitioners of Cartomancy are generally known as Cartomancers, card readers or, simply, readers. Some practitioners have claimed that Cartomancy's origins date back to ancient Egyptian times, the art being derived from wisdom given to the ancient Egyptians. A standard card deck can be used for Cartomancy, but many other decks have also been designed that are intended specifically for use for divination, the best known of which are tarot decks. The more unknown ways of Cartomancy are much like Cleromancy. You write down your options on notes of paper and then pick them randomly. The interpretation of the meanings of different cards, even within the same deck, varies greatly among Cartomancers. This raises doubt in the idea that there is some objective message coming directly from the cards. However, if you choose to try this, using cards, here is the French suited Playing Card and Latin suited Tarot Equivalents:
Clubs = Sticks or wands (power) Fire element
Diamonds = Coins or mirrors, aka Pentacles (health; material matters) Earth element
Hearts = Cups (emotions) Water element
Spades = Swords (intellect; education) Air element

Guess the bottom-line is that no wonder the biggest reason for war is religion if people write it down as several options...

Superstitions for life (part 1)

2008-02-24T05:35:00.000-08:00

Luck
Most people prefer to say they belong to a religion, or that they don’t believe in anything. But the truth is that most people regardless of religion and other beliefs, believe in one united thing. This thing is called SUPERSTITION. It’s weird how people deny this. Around a gambling table 99% of us won’t prey to a God or anything divine to get lucky. No, most of us would do stupid things and believe in one thing, luck. And what is luck really if not a lame excuse for a silly superstition? People blowing their dices, or closing their eyes at the craps table are grand examples of what I’m talking about. But they are not the only one believing in luck and bad luck, and you know it! So next time you shout out during Yatzy “Come on lucky SIXERS!!!”, or wearing your “lucky-pants” to a job interview, think about changing your beliefs instead.

Scrying
Some people claim they can predict the future. Throughout the ages people have invented different ways to this is. One of them the classic way is crystal gazing or crystal seeing. The way to this is to have a crystal ball and then “predict the future” or seeing things supernaturally. Of course most people don’t believe this, but rather pay people for fortune-telling for fun or as a joke. The common way to practice scrying is to have one or several scripts. Then you either learn these by memory, or keep them somewhere unseen. Then when a client comes a long you pick the one seemingly suiting for the situation and reads/speaks/act it out. The scripts are normally written by people that know common ways of living life, or knowing what people want to hear. You can also write these scripts yourself, but then you would have to study the way of a common life. One example of what a “crystal reader” might say: “You are not as rich as you want to be, but you get by.” This is very normal for most people, and we kind of adjust to this truth. And to predict the future, you can just say. “I see love in the near future”. This is too very normal for most people, and you can adlib it a little bit by asking some obvious questions about their life. The questions you ask is to find out if the client(s) have a boyfriend/girlfriend or so on, or noticing a wedding band for instance. If you believe this crap I wish you good luck when you want to know your future for less money than you spend on food in an average week.

Alternative religions (part 1)
If you now are looking for a new religion, either because you haven’t gotten any or because you found out you are superstitious, I’ll give you some recommendations on which not to choose. Here are three religions based on purely based on superstitions, but not recommended if you have another option.

1. Cleromancy – the dice religion
2. Magic 8-Ball – the Magic 8-Ball religion
3. Cartomancy – the deck of cards religion.

More information regarding these 3 religions will be posted next Sunday. I originally planned to post them now, but the text was too long. So see you all next time for “Alternative religions (part 2)”, and in the meanwhile try avoiding these horrible options of divination.

favorite Bond-Villains

2008-02-17T09:57:00.000-08:00

This week it will be a rather short blog, due to some illness but anyways the bog must go on.

During the last 21 James Bond movies we have seen a lot of different bad guys. Some have appeared in more than one movie, but some is presented in the beginning, only to die at the end. One can discuss for hours and hours who is the greatest Bond-villain, but I have now taken the time to prioritize the 3 best of them after skills and appearance. Even though you might not agreed with me, or even prefer the books, you should know that my favorites are selected careless of what
other people think.

1. Francisco Scaramanga – "The Man with the Golden Gun"
Mr. Scaramanga is the absolute favorite. This James Bond's exact opposite, bizzaro-bond if you will. Scaramanga is the ultimate challenge for our hero. He has gadgets, brains, high skilled performance in shooting, a car that can do more than follow the road, his own private island that can create a perfect arena, a personal servant who is both clever and funny. All this and much more adds up and so creates the perfect Bond-villain.

2. Jaws - "The Spy Who Loved Me" and "Moonraker"
Even though Jaws is just a henchman for the villain in these two films, he does an amazing job as a bad guy. His skills are few and his intelligence aren't to high. But he has special metal jaws and a size with a strength to match. He shows no mercy (except in the end of "Moonraker") and even then it is hardly to his advantage. This all makes him a rock-solid Bond-villain.

3. Oddjob - "Goldfinger"
Oddjob is a henchman to the villain Auric Goldfinger, who just didn't make the cut to the favorite list. But Oddjob is the strongest character in the Bond series. He is superior in unarmed combat skills to Bond and has an impressive way to perform his decapitations. It takes James Bond a combination of luck and cunning to deal with this bad guy, and all in all this makes him a great challenge of a Bond-villain.

Theese are the 3 villains that did not quite make it to the top 3:

Auric Goldfinger - "Goldfinger"
With a super fetish for gold

Ernst Stavro Blofeld - several films as leader for SPECTRE
The super villain, Ernst Stavro Blofeld who usually appears accompanied by a white Persian cat in several films as leader for the group SPECTRE.

006 Alec Trevelyan - "Goldeneye"
James Bonds co-agent until a dangerous mission separates them, and Alec turns to the "dark side".

Watch some James Bond movies now and enjoy the villains...

Happy Violence

2008-02-10T08:19:00.000-08:00

Some people say that this phenomenon does not exist. I would admit that it was true, if someone used the phrase concerning real life. But when it comes to movies, fantasy and comics, it is a fact that happy violence exists. The meaning of "happy violence" is basically violence that either makes you happy, looks funny or have a funny twist. A typical example of happy violence is slapstick humor. It all started in the early comedies, and where made famous by, among others, Charles Spencer Chaplin (aka. Charlie Chaplin).

Movies and happy violence

As mentioned earlier slapstick humor have been around for ages, but the real happy violence isn't that innocent. That's why the happy violence did not start until later on, because of the low tolerance of the audience and the people around. For years the movie violence where connected with the word tragedy, but during the late 70's and early 80's something happen. A revolution you might say. Even though if you look close enough you might find earlier works with happy violence, one of the most known works from our life time is supposaly "Die Hard" (1988, John McTiernan). I can also recommend "The Punisher" (2004, Jonathan Hensleigh) and most recently "Shoot 'Em Up" (2007, Michael Davis). Some movies are to be considered happy violence after their time. Meaning the films that where once serious thrillers, horror movies or something similar, are now so old they get to be involuntary funny. For example "Jaws" (1975, Steven Spielberg), "Rocky" (1976, John G. Avildsen), "First Blood" (1982, Ted Kotcheff). Even though these films can be taken seriously these days, the violence in them and the concept is too funny to ignore.

Fantasy with fantastic violence
Although games containing blood being victims of criticism and harassment these days, some of them contains violence and humor as well. Unfortunately I'm not an expert in this field, but when it comes to RPG games I got my share of experience. The best examples I have are from "pen and paper" RPG's like D&D. The reason for this is of course that you are "free" to create you own universe. Let's create a possible example of a D&D story...
DM says: "You fumble, and your arrow hits Hicoro's but, instead of your enemy."
Hicoro says: "I take the arrow out of my ass and aim it at my enemy."
Everybody is screaming: Hehe.. Crit it! Come on dude! Kill him!
Hicoro screams: "Yeah! It's a crit!"
DM says: "Yes indeed. Your slightly bloody and bent arrow hits your enemy in the eye and kills him"
Now if this isn't violence, than what is? And everybody is happy, laughing and having a good time!

Comics containing comical violence
Probably the most known source of happy-violence in comics are the Japanese "manga". "Manga" is in fact the Japanese word for comics and print cartoons. They more often than not contain a high level of blood and violence. Sometimes this turns out to be very funny indeed. My highest level of experience in manga is probably "Dragon Ball" ( 42-volume series from 1984 to 1995, written and illustrated by Akira Toriyama). The plot is simple and the violence is as well. A monkey-tailed Saiyan boy from outer-space Son Goku goes on a life-long adventure beginning with a quest for the seven titular Dragon Balls. A long the way he befriends many different martial artists and faces various villains. In these books the violence is tuned down a bit from the more "adult" manga and anime, but still the violence is normally fun as well as life changing for Son Goku and his friends.

Guess the bottom line this week is to check out the references mentioned. And remember the violence is never bad as a long as it stays in a fantasy world.

The shit really hit the fan now!

2008-02-03T14:38:00.000-08:00

Today: Jokes

There is loads of different kind of jokes out there. Some good, most of them bad. When I say most of them, I of course think of the jokes that never die. I bet that most countries have some sort of national jokes that will go on for ever. Let's take USA for example, they have the "Knock-knock"-jokes, like we in Norway have "Alle Barna"-jokes ("all the kids"). In Scandinavia we also have a tradition telling jokes about the Swedish guy, the Danish guy and the Norwegian guy. These jokes all have the same storyline. And as kids you love them, but as you grow older you are so tired of them that you rather drive of a bridge than hear one more of them.

People also tend to use the words "joke","joking" or "kidding" after saying something they realize they shouldn't have said, or if they say something stupid that no one really gets. Using one of those words basically is an excuse making you able to say almost anything you want. For example:
Guy 1: "Did you see her? She looked like a giant marshmallow!"
Guy 2: "What do you mean?"
Guy 1: "Like a marshmallow, didn't you see her dress?"
Guy 3: "Dude, that's my sister!"
Guy 1: "Kidding!"

And no for the lowest sense of humor out there. "That's what she said..." That is much like the words I wrote above. You can use it in almost any situation. Example:
Guy 1: "You made me scream!"
Guy 2: "That's what she said..."
Did it suck? Oh yes it did. Now I hope you realize that if you think of a joke like that you are not the master of humor, you are the master of nothing. That is not a joke, you are a joke!

Hope you all learned something about staying away from bad jokes, not using jokes as an excuse. If you have to use something like this, please, for the love of God stay clear of me because I will blow up!

If you are now thinking, "That's what she said..." Get help!

Author Recommends (part 1)

2008-01-28T07:25:00.000-08:00

Sport

We all know that sport is only a subject of hate and irritation with few exceptions*. I'm not a sportsfan myself, I'm the one that avoids football matches (/soccer), golf, basket and all the other crap where people invest more money than they should. Have you ever thought about why so many people blame the referees in sports? It's because all sportsfans are bad losers, not only that, but they don't realy know what they are talking about. Think about it, what is the first thing the losing team of almost any sport do? They complain about the referees. "If the referees only had done their job we would have won..." "If the referees wherent so incompotent, we woud have won..." Let me tell you one thing, if you had played better maybe you had a chance of winning. Due to this attitude people turn to sports where the ref doesn't get as much blame. Sports like Curling, Billiard, Snooker, etc. Where people of the more sofisticated grouops can get the satisfaction they need.While all the burping, screaming, disgusting people with huge bellys shaped like a keg is left yelling bad synonyms from the tribunes is on a football match where you chased all the refs to suicide. Before that happens and the time of doom is upon us, check out Snooker!

P.S!
My appolgize to those of you (if any) that waited for my post last saturday or sunday. Totally sipped my mind, thats why I'm posting today instead. And to those of you that didn't read last post's edit, it is now open for everyone to comment on my blog, not only the ones with google account. So I dare you all to try...

Theories about nothing

2008-01-19T12:38:00.000-08:00

Sale

Why do stores bother to hang up signs about sale? The word has lost all meaning. When a “SALE!” poster hangs in a store window all year round, the word looses all meaning. It is like a person walking around apologizing all the time. The only reason people actually think something is on sale is either because they are stupid, or the fact that they checked the prizes earlier and the things they want to buy are ACTUALLY on sale. Some women have a unique ability to learn when the sales in different stores are on. Apparently, the real sales are following seasons and the only way to know that is through experience from when the stores only did hang up sale signs during the various sale-seasons. So why bother to buy things on sale if you don’t know it is on sale in reality? Because you are stupid enough to fall for illusions written in large print.

Comments

I like to be commented on something I worked on, and there are of course different types of comments. You have the lame comments, example: “Good”, “Bad”, “Okay” and so on. You have the lame comments with a bit of enthusiasm, example: “Very good”, “Very bad”, “I don’t know yet” and so on. Then continues to varies of some passion involved, example: “Brilliant”, “Sucks”, “What the fuck?” and so on. However, the comments I like is very people actually bothered to analyze it or think about it. I don’t care if some people accuse me of being a horrible writer, as long as they let med know what they didn’t like or put some passion and feelings into it. But the worst type of comments are those who does not exist in real life, I’m talking about the ones that people think about and either are to afraid or to lazy to type or talk about. I am not too selfish, but even so, I would prefer some comments on my blog posts. I would like to know if my posts are something else than good/bad/awful/hilarious. Do I ruffle any feathers around or do people simply not care. I forgive the ones that let me know through other sources what they think about my blog, but if you feel bad, post a comment to one or more posts and save yourself from further “harassment”. I do not command you to comment every week, but I will not complain about it. Don’t be a brain-dead jackass post a comment!

P.S! If you don’t know how you are too stupid to read English and should throw your computer out the window. However if you still really want to know how to do it, follow this link for a translation to Norwegian: http://pinchofcecily.blogspot.com/2008/01/hvordan-kommentere-p-bloggposter.html

EDIT: It has come to my attention that to comment it requires a google blog account, well not anymore. Comment and discuss to your fingers bleed...

The shit really hit the fan now!

2008-01-13T05:11:00.000-08:00

The title is my favorite English expression. It my not be the perfect explanation for this rant, but I think it is suiting somehow. I have decided to have a rant occasionally about things that bothers me. Even though I think, some people might raise questions about what the difference is on my normal blogs, and this one. Well there is an easy way to explain it. Normally my other blog posts contains a rant somewhat like this, but with a topic that sort of follows the whole blog, but whit the “The shit really hit the fan now!” blogs I will complain about different things that bothers me in the same post. And now for something completely different.

Mobile phones (/cell phones)
Poor kids, they don’t know what’s good for them. These days’ kids get their mobile phones when they are way too young to make their own decisions. Probably the parents fault for not being able to say no to their kids, but it might be that they just lack control over where their kids are. When I was young, I did not get my first mobile phone until I could buy it myself, and even so, I had to wait until I was 16 or something. But now day’s kids get their phones when they barely can walk upright and don’t even learn about responsibility or the lesson in working for something or saving your money. You know the shit has hit the fan when your kids spend their pre-paid phone cards in 1 one day on some stupid mobile tones/games or some other crap. So this one is for all the parents out there! Get a grip on reality and don’t be afraid to say “NO!” to your kids once in a while! It is not their fault they spend their allowance on mobile frauds, when you haven’t taught them nothing about the real life!

Chatting IRL
For those who did not get the title there, it means chatting In Real Life. The reason I’m mad about this is vis-à-vis, the following: People who use gamer/chatting expressions when they SPEAK with one an other! Why the hell do you do that? I can hardly stand that kind of chat in games or “chat-rooms”. I am a gamer, and make it somewhat hard to play MMO’s when you can’t stand the way people type in the chat. Even so what I really can’t stand are people who use them in real life talks. Let us take an example. We have a guy who does not play online games or chat too much, but he is a funny guy, let’s call him Charlie. Then we have the other guy, a gamer who is obsessed by short terms, let‘s call him Bill. Charlie tells Bill a joke and Bill thinks it is really funny. But instead of laughing, this is the way Bill reacts: “LOL! MFA! ROFLMAO! WTF A COOL JOKE FTW! LOL2K”. Let’s translate, shall we? LOL = Laughing Out Loud, MFA = Mother Fucking Awesome, ROFLMAO = Rolling On Floor Laughing My Ass Off, WTF = What The Fuck, FTW = For The Win, LOL2K = Laughing Out Loud 2000 times. This is just too weird! People should not be allowed to talk this way, and I know for a fact that some people do! Now if you think something is funny, YOU LAUGH! You don’t say LOL! If you type HAHA or HEHE instead of LOL you have to type one more letter, and I think you can manage that. But when you talk, you are not really honest if you say LOL instead of just laughing. GROW UP AND GET WELL!

Until next time, try to not piss me of will you?

P.S!
Self-criticism
I know that in my last post I was a bit stressed. In addition, I promised you all that I would come up with more movies containing random sex-scenes. I now got three movies you all should check out, which contains good examples on random sex-scenes. Check out “True Romance” (1993, Tony Scott), 8 Mile (2002, Curtis Hanson), and last but not least “The Departed” (2006, Martin Scorsese). Enjoy these movies, and try to figure out why they contain random sex-scenes…

Turkey (Part 2)

2008-01-04T20:10:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year folks, I am sure this year is going to bring us many more bad movies and blockbusters nobody cares about. Some people have been complaining about my inaccuracy when it comes to bad movies, but people have different tastes… And they are usually worse than mine. All I know is that I should have added some more points to the technical errors, but I will probably get my chance in later blogs. Let us get to the case of the two other elements of bad movies that I have yet to complain about… for now.

Random sex-scenes - I am not one to complain about sex-scenes, but sometimes it looks like they tried to create a pornographic movie instead of a regular one. When a movie contains a nude scene, sex-scene or a make-out session in a movie, it can sometimes help the story to move forward or make the characters more real. Sex-scenes can very often provide the movie with important details and information. However, more often than not a sex-scene can destroy the movie experience. Random sex-scenes are like that, they are unimportant and annoying. There are mainly two different reasons for a random sex-scene. 1. The movie is too short and need to put in some sex-scenes to make it last longer. And sex is something that people in general enjoy to watch as well as fact that they don’t really care about the time when it is on. 2. Sex always sells. One or more sex-scenes in a movie can therefore boost DVD or ticket sales on an otherwise bad movie. One good example of a movie containing important sex-scenes, watch “Basic Instinct” (1992, Paul Verhoeven). And for a movie with a random sex-scene, watch “300” (2006, Zack Snyder), is not the best example, but I will edit later and add at least one more example if I can recall it. If you are not satisfied just watch some exploitation movies they normally have a great deal of random sex-scenes.

Plot troubles - As mentioned earlier a random sex-scene is usually placed to extend the movies. But it’s used to cover up plot-holes as well. A plot-hole is where the writer or team behind the movie fails. They fail to either write it good enough, or think they have a script that is too short for a whole movie. There are some movies where a good plot can make up for reckless screw-ups in a film, but in addition there are movies with such a horrible plot/script that you have to suffer your way through the movie. As an example of the first one, check out “Bridge to Terabithia” (2007, Gabor Csupo), the acting is at times awful, but the script (though based on a book) is so brilliant it rather gives the film a natural balance. For an example of a bad plot, check out “Crossroads” (2002, Tamra Davis), in addition this movie is also a good example of the term “Sex sells”. Though there is hardly any part nudity in this film, the whole film is based on the fact that Britney Spears “looks good”.

My plan was to write more about the horrible elements of bad movies, and write more about bad scripts and plots. However, I have to save some for later. Next time I will talk about something else. But keep in mind I will make a blog on elements and surroundings that ruin the movie experience, mainly in movie theaters and such. So until next time watch bad movies and help the world to be a better place by BURNING THEM! (Not to another DVD, but literally burn them to ash and dust!)

Turkey (part 1)

2007-12-29T15:34:00.000-08:00

We are closing up in New Years Eve, and around the world people are eating turkeys, so let us talk about turkeys in another form than food. This just would not be my blog without a movie rant. And this movie blog is going to be about bad movies mainly. In addition, what elements does it take to make a bad movie? There is guarantied more elements that can pull a movie in a bad direction than I can rant about in just one blog, but I will try to clarify some of them.

Bodybuilders - If you want to sell your movie as a blockbuster, a great movie or just a movie, avoid using bodybuilders at all cost. I have not seen to any good movies with bodybuilders. To be honest I have not seen many movies with bodybuilders as actors that manage to be more than just average entertainment in my eyes. The only movies has got to be “Be Cool” with the “The Rock” who is not really a bodybuilder as far as I know, but the only reason that one works as “okay” entertainment, is the fact that “The Rock” only got a small part, and that the movie actually uses him as a element of irony. Looking at action movies, I think we can establish that both the “rocky”-movies and the “terminator”-movies, has survived because people like to laugh at bad actors while they punch and explode things.

Technical errors - many movies have low economy and there for are forced to use outdated electronics or cheap equipment to make their films. This is not always a bad thing, but it is when it is used by people that generally can’t make movies, and make loads of technical errors, the result can never be good. However, a low budget movie has proven to have qualities, like “Blair Witch Project” (1999, Daniel Myrick, Eduardo Sánchez). However, it is when an expensive movie, with quality equipment. These movies are generally movies based on the equipment, because the script, actors and team behind it sucks. Want examples? Here we go, “Pathfinder” (2007, Marcus Nispel), “Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace” (1999, George Lucas), “Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones” (2002, George Lucas), “Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith” (2005, George Lucas), “Troy” (2004, Wolfgang Petersen), and many others.

And I will now attempt to save the rest of my complains about baaad movies until next time. Go home and watch “Hercules in New York” (1970, Arthur Allan Seidelman) and “Hulk” (2003, Ang Lee). Until next time, this is me saying: “Nothing is so bad it isn’t good for anything! (Except bad movies that you can’t even laugh at!)”

Vacation

2007-12-17T20:29:00.001-08:00

Some people might ask me after they read the title, “how can you whine and complain about something as good as vacation?” Well, shut up, and let me explain. For what is a vacation really, but another way for the employer to make you take less sick-days? “Well isn’t that a good thing?” you might ask. In my experience, it is not always a good thing. In our society there is a law that says you need to take a vacation every year, and that you should be able to decide when, (might vary from different types of profession). I also realize that these rules are not the same everywhere, and that we in Norway are lucky. (Nevertheless, shhhh, do not break the illusion).

First of all, the days you got for vacation every year are normally counted in weeks, that means you can’t really spend them, as you want. For instance if you say you want 2 weeks off from work, and you normally work Monday-Friday and have Saturdays and Sundays off. Saturday and Sunday should not count those 2 weeks. I mean you don’t work those days anyways, so why should you need spend your vacation days on your days off? Let’s say you said you wanted 2 weeks of from Monday the 1. of June, or something. For the average employee, that means you will be back Monday 15th. After my count that is wrong. In there you got 2 weekends not counted for as normal days off. So instead, you should be back Friday the 19th. And that my friend, is something wrong about vacations and the “society” controlling our life and stealing our precious time.

And here is another wake-up call. In general, people appreciate holydays you get around Christmas, Easter, etc. However, what have we learned so far? There are no free vacations. In general, people have to take many holidays out of their limited vacation-days every year. Like 25th and 26 December (first and second day of Christmas), and a lot more days just like them. I am sure many people would want to spend a vacation day or two there anyways. However, my point is that YOU and everyone out there working should be able to make that choice. I’m sure that there is someone out there that would rather be working all holydays, than any other day of the year. Some people are lonely and for those people, national/religious holydays are a drag. People spending time with their family and friends, and a little lonely guy or woman sitting in front of the TV and waiting to get back to work.

The point of this whole rant is to make people aware of all those days of vacation they miss out on. So think about that this Christmas when you eat as much as possible and sit as much as possible. Think of all the lonely and poor people that are not allowed to work, and think about all the days of vacation you could have spent sitting and eating, if it weren’t for this stupid society.

Merry Christmas… Hohoho…

Monday morning blues

2007-12-14T15:43:00.000-08:00

I know it's a bit of a cliché, but I just had to write about it. Can you think of anything worse than waking up at the crack of dawn a monday morning? Well you probably can, but for me the whole process of waking up by an alarm clock is a horrible nightmare. So I ask you instead, can you think of anything worse than waking up to a horrible nightmare day after day? Probably, but I'm guessing I’m closing in on the worst things you can think of. For me standing up involuntary is just a beginning of a horrible nightmare. As you should have been able to figure out by now, I'm not a “morning-person”. I can "survive" the whole waking up part, if I can wake up by my own. If I can't wake up by my own mind, I should not need to tell you, RUN!

My alarm clock is my worst enemy. The horrible sound of it makes it sound like its war, rather than morning glory. That is why I never want to walk up to the most beautiful song in the world. If I do that, I will eventually learn to hate it as much as my normal alarm. Why? Because I associate it with pain, agony, hate, and reputation, (which by the way are the same words used in one of the many descriptions of what "hell" is supposed to be like). So as you see, I might as just use a tune/alarm I already hate.

Luckily I now study high up, (most likely described as "university" or "collage" in English, "Høgskole" in Norwegian), and don't need to be up as early as most people. To me, a lover of the night, going to sleep is a drag if I have to get up early in the morning. But after going through and teaching myself a whole lot tips and tricks it makes the getting up part a lot easier. Unfortunately this does not make me enjoy getting up from bed more than normal.

I hate mornings and I probably always will. Mornings are to be the worst part of my day. You might think that there are bigger troubles in the world than getting up, but I’m sure that the world would be a greater place. That is clearly never going to happen, so I guess our society will keep going downhill.

Until next time have fun getting up early, I'm going to sleep as long as I possibly can!

Me?

2007-12-10T07:20:00.000-08:00

Well this post is all about me...woot. "Finally!" You might think. "Finally we can learn to know the guy pushing the buttons on the keyboard... I waited since day one!". Well if that's what you're thinking, this is your lucky day. If you already know me, or don't care, you might find this rather boring. I will though advice you to read this anyway. Not just because my ego, but because you might learn something new, or new ways to annoy me.

First let's take the basics. I'm a 22 year old guy, studying bachelor in film- and television-science, at Lillehammer (a little cold town in Norway, famous for winter OL in 1994). I play WOW, D&D, watch a great deal of movies and talk to people I know in real life as well in game. My hopes and dreams are to become a writer (an author) of book(s), or something inside movies (hopefully a movie critic).

Likes: To write (everything from short stories to blogs and hopefully a novel some day), watch movies (wide range of good movies and TV-shows. Not crap like "Cross roads" and "Lost"), play WoW, play D&D (or be DM), sing in the shower, loads of white snow, sitcoms (some, not all.. really enjoy British sitcom's), sitting up at night, snowboarding, pizza, music (only good music, not the cheap crap on your radio), Coca Cola, warm environments, some cartoons (Pondus, M, Dark Legacy comics, Nemi ++), going to sleep clean in newly washed bed spreads, social and nice people, sleeping as long as I want to, making people laugh, and of course women (in my age range).

Dislikes: When people tickle me, nagging, not having stable and good internet connection, not having a PC, have to be outside in several hours when it rains, being sick, doing chores, competing in things I'm not really good at, preparing for exams, waiting, things that don't work as they supposed to do, reading the words GAME OVER (or "You can't do that when you're dead"), people in pain or crying, being afraid/nervous or stressed, throwing up, things that smell bad, Grete Preus's and Ole Paus's music, being bored, and people that act childish in a non-funny way, getting up early in the morning.

Of course there is a lot more to it, but I think I got a lot of the basics covered. You will learn more about me and other interesting facts in later blogs. And if you wonder why I just wrote basic facts, and not more about my personality, it’s because I have different pans for posts about this. Like my own personal “dictionary”.

So blog off and I’ll catch you next time, with more aggressive and hopefully more grumpy stuff.

Blog off

2007-12-05T17:08:00.000-08:00

I'm so sick and tired of blogs... Everywhere I turn there is some kid, scientist, teacher or adult talking about blogs. Most of them doesn't even know what a blog are. Blogs are everywhere now, theese days. It's like the new trend or something. How did it get so popular? And why don't people react on the fact that blogs are here to ruin our society? Well I
think, most of them are too scared. Most people don't dare to react on something, too afraid they
might be harassed in public.

And if you reading this wonder what a blog is, here is the correct defenition: It's short for "Web log," a specialized site that allows an individual or group of individuals to share a running log of events and personal insights with online audiences. Blogs with political or current-events themes have grown in popularity and become "soap boxes" for instant mass-audience commentary. It's also a: A frequently updated journal or diary usually, often hosted by a third party.

To me a blog is: "Web log," that allows a person to share a running log of personal insight.

This is what annoys me with most bogs: Blogs that have political or current-events themes, and should rather be written as an artical on a personal, public or political website. It's also a: A frequently annoying journal or diary usually, often hosted by a third party.

A blog should NEVER and I mean NEVER contain anything except personal insights on stuff. Why? Because a blog should tell a lot about your personality, not your poitacal views, and not what you did one week from now. If you have big needs to let people know your political views, become a journalist or a politician! If you have huge ego to let poeple know your diary (stating your puberty and other very uninteresting things going on in your life), you should seek help.

Eventhough you migt not find my blog all that interesting either, at least my blog contains some insights that reflects my personality. Oh, and it is true, my blog will often be inconsistent, negative and very annoying!

So why bother to blog? Well I guess we all have needs to express ourselves public sometimes, but most of all, let people know we exist!

Preludium

2007-12-01T08:27:00.000-08:00

Hi everyone...
Yes I'm now one of those... "Who?" You might ask, well, one of thos bloggers apperently. My blog is basicly going to contain my thoughts, opinions, hopes, dreams and negative attitude (just for fun). I'm not an "emo-kid", not a born writer (I think, although might have some talent), and I'm not an expert in english. What I am is this, an abnormal guy 22 years of age, with many wierd thoughts spinning around. Hopefully you might find some of my blogs interresting enough to post a comment, if not, I don't really care.

Have fun guys and girls...

Sincerly Aleks (SheK, Crusaider, Tøytedokka or whatever name you know and feel comfortable enough using).